THE FESTIVAL EDITION

So, when The Great Edinburgh Pub Challenge finally returned to your computer screen after another hiatus of several months, what did you expect to find? Well it doesn’t really matter what your answer to that rather rhetorical question is, as here’s what you are getting – a guide to the venues we visited during the Edinburgh Festival in 2008. Of course, the fact that this update is being published in mid-January means that a) it is completely useless as any form of guide to people wishing to take in the shows we have reviewed (or more accurately, linked you to reviews of as we’re just too bloody lazy – or had spent too much time at the bar - to type a full critique ourselves), and b) it will probably have absolutely no relevance when the Festival rears its head come August. Still, the show must go on.

For those of you who do not know about it, the Edinburgh Festival is the world’s largest arts festival. Technically it is actually a collective term for a number of smaller festivals which take place around the city for a period of roughly four weeks, but for the purposes of this article we shall consider the Festival to be a single entity. What difference does it make to our lives? Traffic grinds to a halt (nothing new, the grumpier half of the city’s residents would complain), the city is filled to the brim and then some with tourists (giving rise to the same complaint), licensing hours are extended and a series of temporary bars pop up around the city. All things considered, it is a fantastic spectacle and is definitely worth a visit at least once.

This year, The Management’s first experience of the new temporary bars was at the Grolsch Pasture (Bristo Square, 2/23/27/35/41/42/45/67), an open air effort located in the centre of the city’s university district, and plonked down next to a rather unsightly purple inflatable cow – the E4 Udderbelly (cows...pastures...geddit?). This was, in my opinion, the best of the temporary festival bars in 2008 as there was always a lively atmosphere and even the fact that the various beers (Maclachlan’s Best Ale, the full Grolsch range and some other stuff which slips my mind) were served in plastic cups didn’t seem to spoil things. A useful tip for anyone visiting the festival is to hang out in this area during the first week of the Fringe – ticket sales are often fairly slow until the first reviews are published, so you have a good chance of picking up free tickets from passing PR bods.

That was exactly what happened to us, and we managed to score a couple of free passes to Dick Biscuit: Private Eye, a fairly banal affair at the best of times which was thoroughly ruined by the presence of a few JD’n’coke and [potentially defamatory accusations removed – Legal Ed] fuelled Camden luvvie types. We did manage to stop in at La Cantina (Teviot Place, 2/23/27/35/41/43/67), another temporary bar which pops up during the festival. Located inside the University of Edinburgh’s medical buildings, La Cantina makes a fairly half-arsed attempt at being a Mexican themed joint.

A quick curry – in and out (OF THE RESTAURANT, keep your toilet humour to yourselves please) in 25 minutes – followed and we set off to The Queen’s Hall (Clerk Street, 3/5/7/8/14/29/30/31/33/37/47/X48/49) to meet Chris McCall, sometime-hack and regular associate of The Management . Frustratingly , Chris’s review of Camille O’Sullivan, the Irish-French chanteuse, is no longer online – a link to The Scotsman’s review is provided for your perusal. The gig itself was fantastic, the venue providing a fantastic backdrop for O’Sullivan’s reworking of classics by Brel, Bowie and Waits, to name but a few.

By now it was approaching midnight, so we decided to pop round to The Auld Hoose (St. Leonard’s Street, 2) for a swift half* or three, and to make use of their well-stocked jukebox. The following playlist had just been selected:- The Violent Femmes – Blister in the Sun; The Cure – In Between Days; The White Stripes – Fell in Love with a Girl; The Velvet Underground – I’m Waiting for the Man; The Stooges – 1969; Radiohead – My Iron Lung; Lou Reed – Take a Walk on the Wild Side; Pixies – Here Comes Your Man; Bob Dylan – Shelter from the Storm; The White Stripes – The Hardest Button to Button -when the peace was shattered by a knock at the window behind our table. Somewhat bemused, we looked up to see a daft grin bearing down on us: after months of avoiding putting in an appearance (and, now I come to think of it, getting a round in), celebrity chunderer and all round good guy (except for the aforementioned lack of round discipline) Adam Johns had finally turned up! He managed to stay for a swift half before heading off into the night to do something else.

The Management’s second, and – it seems baffling now – final night out during the festival was a trip to see Northern comedian Alun Cochrane at the Assembly Rooms (George Street, 24/29/42), another of the fantastic old venues in Edinburgh’s city centre. These Rooms are not open as public bar all year round, but host various events on an irregular basis, and form one of the main venues during the festival. The reaction to the show was generally positive, and Cochrane got a bonus point from me for incorporating the Elbow song at the end.

After a quick trip to All Bar One (Phil Brough managed not to drop his pint this time round), we headed down to the Queen’s Arms (Frederick Street, 24/29/42) for a nightcap – and more specifically to sample Marching Orders the Caledonian Brewery’s festival beer of 2008. Very drinkable it was as well.

UNTIL THE NEXT TIME
Cumulative pub count: 109

*Note: “Swift half” does not mean drinking a half pint, except in the case of Adam Johns.

From Untitled Album